RICH BAE POOR BAE

Robert Kiyosaki is one of my favorite entrepreneurs. His book- Rich Dad, Poor Dad- is one of both mine and my Father’s favorites. My Father is undoubtedly my best friend, my soulmate, my role model and my first love. There fore, he shares all his thoughts, ideas and knowledge with me. I had a talk with him recently about the things that made Rich dad rich and Poor dad poor. The concept of rich or poor starts in the mind and our innate cognitive functions. A rich or a poor mindset affects more than one’s finances, it also affects one’s approach to life, how they handle their relationships, and how they handle their growth. Among many others, our conversation boiled down to the following things relevant to this article;

1. Rich Dad was a risk taker, he loved to put himself out there and explore opportunities. He was open to new things, experiences, and perspectives. Where as Poor Dad on the other hand, was afraid of taking risks. He also had no space for new perspectives. points of view, and experiences.
2. Rich Dad was comfortable with the uncertainties and roller coasters that come with business. He saw these as part of everyday life as a business man and did not let them shake him. Instead, he kept himself stable and consistent, moving forward and staying present. Poor Dad however, panicked at every sign of uncertainty. Unlike his counterpart, he viewed risks as something to be evaded and feared, unless they played into his already existing ideology.
3. Poor Dad’s ideology was to have one stream of income. To pick one thing alone and focus all his energy into it. To put all his eggs in one basket. And if the basket dropped, he would simply just go into a downward spiral and frenzy. Rich Dad on the other hand, had several streams of income. He did not put all his eggs in one basket. He was creative and imaginative.
4. Rich Dad saw possibilities where Poor Dad saw limitations. Rich Dad had a ‘this and that’ mindset, where poor dad had a ‘this or that’ mindset.
5. Poor Dad stayed away from rich people and entrepreneurs, he closed himself off and painted them as the other while Rich Dad surrounded himself with such people even though it made him feel uncomfortable sometimes.

We all know that being rich or poor starts in the mind. There is a poverty mindset, and there is a wealth mindset. I have noticed this principle play out in my relationships as well.

In the Summer of 2019, I met two males. Both with whom I eventually had romantic relations with. I shall call them Bruce and Vlad. As these are the first letters of their names. I met Vlad at a party, and Bruce through a friend.

BRUCE

Bruce and I hit it off first, and for some reason, I really liked him. We talked a lot and became close. Our conversations were amazing and gradually, feelings started to develop. In the beginning, we connected emotionally and sexually, but not mentally. While we all have our own issues, quirks and imperfections, I have come to believe that there was, still is and probably will always be something severely and dreadfully off about Bruce’s cognitive functioning. I always felt an aura of instability radiating from him. I am psychic so I always sensed underlying tension, anxiety and negative (or even evil) energy inside him.

Again, none of us are perfect, but this one was special. His default setting was a state of self pity, anger, defensiveness and aggression, he had beliefs that every one in the world is full of shit, and constantly tried to bring out my bad side. Whenever I would try to open up to him, he would lash out and then project all sorts of things on to me. He always said things about himself like “I’m poor”. He constantly talked about how poor he was, he constantly said things like; “I don’t have friends, and I don’t care” “I’m insecure” “Do you really love me?” He was never open to any one else’s point of view, especially mine. He believed in all or nothing, his way or the high way. Either agree with everything he says and does, or leave. With him, it was never this and that, it was this or that.

Bruce had self esteem issues, he constantly spoke about how shy he was. To be honest, from my numerous experiences with shy boys who have low self esteem, they are all covert narcissists. If you get close to them, they will feel inferior to you and jealous of your happiness and confidence. Bruce absolutely hated confident and outspoken people. He hated people that voiced their opinions, he hated people that appeared confident and vibrant. Aside from that, he hated vegans (which I am), the LGBT community, superficial celebrities, basically anyone he could not relate to that spoke their truth. His hatred was not outward and direct, it was all passive aggressive. He was just a sad, angry, poor and depleted old man in a 20 year old’s body (sucks to be him).

In regards to his goals, he put all his eggs in one basket, as soon as that basket started shaking, he would begin to ignore and act aggressive/dismissive towards me. He also believed that one cannot have a relationship and focus on goals at the same time (some people function like this, and its okay). However, he strung me along the first time, and when things became shaky in his life, he began to push me away.

VLAD

Vlad’s default setting is a state of pragmatism, abundance, self love and rationality. When I met him at the party, we struck up a conversation. It was evident immediately that we clicked on a mental and intellectual level. He told me about his business and I told him about my goals and aspirations. Classic bonding between a Sagittarius and a Gemini. After meeting him at the party, he gave me his number. To be specific, his business number. I didn’t hit him up though, at the time, he seemed like the type of guy to have multiple other options around him. So I did not even bother.

He searched for me and found me on Instagram. The first thing he tried to do was get me into the business of online trading. He replied to my stories, and frequently called me. In the beginning, we connected mentally, sexually but the emotional bit had an issue at first. I was suspicious of him for some reasons. Plus, he is a very rational and real person, I had never encountered that before. Vlad encouraged my self affirmations, my vegan diet and my love for BTS. From the way he talked about himself, I could sense confidence and maturity.

We connected spiritually as well. He added me to an online program by Deepak Chopra. He introduced me to the concept of ‘Abundance’, a Hindu and Buddhist concept. A mindset of wealth, a mindset of manifesting from the universe, a belief that there is plenty, a belief in growth and a belief in life’s tendency to produce more of everything. He had me chanting mantras, and meditating to soothing music. He had me practicing mindfulness and gratitude. He urged me to pray and speak affirmations in order to attract and harness energy from the universe. I did not see it at the time but, Vlad’s default setting when he likes someone is to get them to level up.

When Bruce came back into my life, Vlad and I drifted apart for a while. I stopped talking to him, and started talking to Bruce again.

Nevertheless, Bruce and I hit things off once more. It was passionate, we talked as much as we used to. We talked about the future, about traveling together, he said he wanted me forever. Everything seemed fine, until one day, out of the blue, he dropped me. Abruptly, with no explanation. He dumped me and he let me fall. His excuse was that something happened in his life and he needed to find himself and to grow. Same as the first time.

I remember the sinking feeling, it was more about the shock and the abruptness of it all. As I fell, guess who was there to catch me, Vlad. It took only three words from him, for me to realize just how much of a gem Vlad is. “I GOT YOU”, he said. Those three words stuck with me. Not because he said them, but because his actions from the moment we met backed them up. Vlad listened to me, gave me honest and rational advice, told me to get back on my shit, continue my affirmations, and didn’t judge me for hitting such a low point. Instead, he just stayed calm, steady, and let me pick myself up again. He brings stability into my crazy Gemini chaos.

The thing about Vlad is that, he works on and focuses on himself, he balances between his inner and outer world. He balances between how much he gives and how much he withholds. He is aware of his own power to cultivate situations that will suit him as well as the people he cares about. He’s got a rich mindset. He has an abundant approach to life where he sees possibilities and believes that the universe is an infinite source of whatever he wants to attract. He spiritually replenishes himself, he physically challenges and builds himself, he mentally builds himself, and he emotionally nurtures both himself and others.

Vlad is a full cup, open to being filled more. Bruce is a nearly empty and closed cup that needs to avoid being depleted further. Therefore, Vlad can pour abundantly and receive. Bruce can only take and save what little he has, after all, he always said so, he is poor. And as long as he remains in that headspace, he will always be poor. Constantly repelling abundance, and attracting emptiness.

Rich Bae saw possibilities where Poor Bae saw limitations. Poor Bae believed in pushing everyone away and isolating himself into a bubble in order to “grow”. Rich Bae believed in embracing growth as a lifelong journey and cultivating useful and meaningful connections, while controlling how much he did or did not invest in those relationships. Poor Bae had an all or nothing mindset. Rich Bae had an “I can have it all.” mentality. Rich Bae is not afraid of conflict and disagreements, he knows that when dealing with humans, these things are inevitable. Poor Bae thought that every disagreement would be the end of our relationship. In other words, for Poor Bae to have a friendship or relationship, the other person needs to constantly agree with everything he says and not stand up for oneself. For his empty and depleted cup will never open up. Poor Bae suppresses, Rich Bae encourages. With Rich Bae, I see the abundance around me. With Poor Bae, I saw limitations and fear.

Rich Bae values individuality, he values the perspectives of others while holding his own. He values friendships and relationships. He is reliable and he is there for those that need him. But most importantly, he is self aware and he takes care of himself. He is aware of his perks, his flaws, and his quirks. He is aware of the world around him, and he is aware of those around him. A quote he posted recently caught my attention.

“Today I am at peace and my mind will no longer over-analyze the past or stress about the unknown ahead. I am present in the moments in front of my eyes.

Jennae Cecelia

This quote stuck with me, and through it, I got to understand him more. He is real and rational. He understands that the human mind is the powerful driver of one’s reality. Therefore, by enriching his mind, he enriches himself and then eventually, he enriches the world around him. Rich mindset = Rich life. More than anything, he has gained my respect. I appreciate him as a person, and not just as a love interest in the story of my life. He has earned my respect and admiration. Rich Bae is definitely a one of a kind human being. Kudos to him! He’s going places.

In life you can either surround yourself with the rich in mind, or the poor. Analyze objectively, and choose wisely.